yeah it's not anger only extreme sadness - I've told R that I'm not mad at him and that I don't want him to feel bad - but I'm not sure how to deal with how I'm feeling right now - That album was a combination of work of a lot of women who were very special to me, and I don't expect it to have the same meaning for R. Normally I guard those kinds of things very closely but I'm trying to give in to the culture and let the boys carry things more often. This is one thing I really shouldn't have let out of my grasp.

I realize that having R in my life is more valuable than pictures, I'm just really sad to have lost them.