I think having children in gradschool might be feasible if I had a trust fund. I can agree with the finishing up one life step thing, except that there is no way I could support children on a poverty level stipend and whatever job R could get.

And you're right year one would be just as demanding or more as I've heard. That's why we won't TTC until I can have a due date that would be after the 1st school year. I've really come to the conclusion that there is never a good time to have kids period. Ideally I'd wait until I have a comfy tenure track job with fabulous benefits, but that would be waiting long enough for my age to make fertility an issue. Everything I hear tells me that having kids in your 20s is just better and easier on the body.