(no subject)

[merchimerch]

Things are going well. I am running into very typical problems for this area of the world. Namely, the institute is trying to charge me $3000 for affiliation even though I'm going to be teaching a class there to the english speakers. Also I went in for a planning meeting for my research and the seminar I'm going to run that was supposed to start at 10 am. I waited untill 12:30 for the 3rd person to show up. He never did even though he talked to the director at 10 and said he'd be in in a half an hour. At least the director got to make a joke about me adopting Uzbek style shyness and patience.

Went for beers yesterday with Anna, my american friend from last year - we went to the tri bochka, the only brew pub in all of Uzbekistan. Unfortunately they were out of dark beer, but even the lighter beer is better than anything you can get out of a bottle here.

R has now been introduced to sqash dumplings (kovoq somsa) and likes them a lot. We've seen quite a few of the people that I'd hoped to and I survived my first dutar lesson.

I brought R to the conservatory with my for my first lesson so that he could distract Malika opa from my lack of practice with his husbandly goodness. Have I mentioned how much the Uzbeks love that I'm married? And that they think R is amazing because he is thoughtful and does nice things for me? It's very good. He's starting to learn his way around - he's bought somsa and bread all by himself and took the metro and made it to the right station to meet me. Navigating a new city is tough even when you speak the language, so I'm quite proud of him. On the downside he's got me playing Diabolo on our new computer....evil video games. Of course I don't have a dutar or any research to read yet, so I suppose I can relax for a while.

I am supposed to have dutar lessons on monday and thursday mornings. I'm not sure when my seminar will meet, but I'm hoping for evenings. I also need to make it to the physics lab for the musical community there, and start going to concerts. I am meeting my friend Hudniddin on sunday to chat - he's a mover and a shaker an I'm hoping he will set up recording sessions for me so I can start my transcriptions early.

Everything is going really well. It is nice to be amongst people that I feel are part of my community. I can't figure out why I'm still having such anxiety. I'm really worried about how to finish my Ph.D. now - I'm worried I won't get a grant for next year and will have to pay tuition, maybe even out of state tuition and I won't have loans set up. I need to trust that something will work out, especially since it is 10 months away, but I'm worried about the future. It all seems so uncertain. Maybe married life is getting to me, but I'd really like to finish my PhD, get a steady job and a mortgage and start having babies. I feel like this should be an attainable goal, but it doesn't seem very attainable at the moment. I guess time will tell.

Comments

[mehitabelmmoss.livejournal.com]

Look - you're a workaholic so the anxiety comes from having nothing (or not alot) to do for a while. I suspect you'll be fine when you have your busy schedule and have to practice, and are teaching real students who want your time.
Is R really busy too? I don't think you're used to having him underfoot.

Now go pick out Ode to Joy on the dutar!

[ktvet06.livejournal.com]

I know how you feel and i'm not even in a foreign country! There's always a million things goign on at once and it gets very overwhelming. i've started power yoga. It's helped me a lot, just carving out that time to not think about school and related stressful issues.

Good luck and have fun :-)

[merchimerch.livejournal.com]

this is a good idea - I did a lot of yoga in CA to take the pressure off. I think yoga exists here - I should track it down.